Thursday 28 August 2014

The poison of unforgiveness

Do you have unforgiveness in your heart?

Perhaps you think you are a forgiving person, but maybe there is still that one person you cannot forgive.  Or the idea of being able to forgive that particular person doesn't actually enter your consciousness maybe...

Today was an epic day for me.  Unresolved issues were resolved, issues that I didn't even know existed were dealt with.  

For the past few days I have been praying and fasting for a resolution over a work issue and today an opportunity arose to finish everything.  It was only after a satisfactory conclusion had been achieved and we were driving home did I realise that in God's eyes the matter was far from closed.  

Despite God blessing me with a speedy and fair resolution I still had unforgiveness in my heart. It hadn't even crossed my mind that I would have to forgive this person, so when my friend asked me if I'd prayed for her I was somewhat taken aback.  Of course I hadn't, I thought to myself, it was as much as I could do to speak her name without releasing a torrent of abuse.  There was clear unforgiveness here and suddenly I understood that in God's eyes this was a much more important issue than the details of a financial dispute.  

After trying to put it out of my mind for a good few hours I did the only thing that I could do under the circumstances.  I gave it to God.  I prayed and I wept for the unforgiveness and bitterness that had taken root in my heart.  

"Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.  Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."  Ephesians 4:31-32

"Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone.  Forgive as the Lord forgave you."  Colossians 3:13.

Only last night I was reminding another friend of these verses to help her with unforgiveness, when in actual fact God really meant them for me.  He does indeed work in mysterious ways.

When unforgiveness takes root in your heart it starts to destroy you from within like a poison eating away at all your goodness.  And yet, when you forgive someone, something amazing happens inside of you.  It's like you are released from the chains that have held you.



I was in chains for years due to the unforgiveness that I held over a previous employer.  Now I pray for this person, I love them in my heart and I know that God will bless them through my prayers.  Unforgiveness does not recognise what is right or just, just as forgiveness is equally indiscriminate.  Jesus died for our sins so that we would be forgiven.  

He didn't die for some of our sins and not others, or for some people to be forgiven whilst those who committed certain sins would be beyond redemption.  

God does not differentiate between sin; "for whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles at just one point is guilty of breaking all of it."  James 2:10

None of us are worthy of the sacrifice Jesus made on the cross, of the sacrifice our Heavenly Father made of sending His only begotten Son to die for us all.  

Today when I got dressed I felt drawn to wear a new purple T-shirt that I had bought at the Detling Celebration with a great message written across the front.  It wasn't until later after wrestling with my unforgiveness that I was able to really accept that this message was meant for me today.  It said, "Grace is getting what I don't deserve, mercy is not getting what I do deserve," and I think this just about sums it up.  

God shows grace and mercy to us in all things and we must do the same.  Matthew 10:8 says "freely you have received, freely give."


Father God, 

Thank you that you so loved the world that you gave your only son so that we might believe and have eternal life.  
Thank you Lord Jesus for dying for us on the cross so that anyone who repents will not perish but be welcomed into the Kingdom of Heaven.  Thank you Father for the free gift of Salvation, of mercy and of grace.  
Forgive us Father for our unforgiving hearts and I pray that you will uproot all bitterness from our innermost being so that we can rejoice with you in Heaven.  
Thank you for your blessings upon my life this day and for sending your Holy Spirit to be an advocate for me in all things.  Forgive me for not always surrendering to you and for trying to battle it out under my own strength.  Help me to give over everything into your hands and I ask that you send your Holy Spirit as a constant reminder that you have my back and that you are the guiding light that will lead me through the narrow gate.  

In Jesus' Mighty Name,

Amen.


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