The ongoing conversation......

At this moment in time I face many decisions which could have a serious effect on my life; my personal life, my financial life, my reputation; a lot is at stake here.  

I was so sure of a certain path that I felt I must take in order to see justice done.  

Then, suddenly I was shown another way.  A way which would certainly give me peace even if in the eyes of the world I had not found justice.  

The Lord says "vengeance is mine" (Romans 12:19), and any action we take to avenge ourselves is not under the guidance of the Holy Spirit.

Over the last few weeks I've heard many people talk about how they want to get closer to God.  This is surely something which any believer seeks isn't it?  

But isn't the answer simple really?  If we spend time with God we get closer to Him.  

Just lately I've found myself praying almost constantly, it's just like having an ongoing conversation with God.  You can hardly say "I want to get closer to God", if you only spend 20 minutes at the beginning of each day and then forget about Him until tomorrow.  Or maybe you only really spend any time with God when you go to church.

If that's you then your actions and your efforts are not suggesting that your heart's desire is to have a close relationship with your Maker.  You are God's child, think of it that way.  Imagine if your own child didn't want to spend time with you.  Especially when they are still young and need much guidance in their lives.  Wouldn't that sadden you?  Many times we are told through scripture to "love the Lord our God with all our heart".  This is in fact, God's greatest commandment.  He created us to love Him.  If we are to love someone we must know them, we must have a relationship with them, we must let them into our lives and share our hearts, we must walk with them, sit with them, talk with them.  It's no different with God, you may not be having coffee with Him but he's still there whilst you are sipping your cappuccino.  

When we are still young in the Christian sense then we need to immerse ourselves in the Word and in prayer as much as we can in order to grow in our relationship with God.  In the beginning it can be difficult to pray, just as it can be difficult to talk to new people if you are shy.  

And then there's the whole issue of who exactly do you pray to?  Jesus or our Heavenly Father?  And don't leave the Holy Spirit out either as it says in Ephesians 4:30 "Do not grieve the Holy Spirit".  
To begin with I really had no idea how to pray, it felt like I was a lone ship in clear blue waters but with absolutely no compass so I looked at the sky and I started with the only thing I knew, the Lord's prayer.  This is a great prayer and when the disciples asked Jesus to teach them how to pray this is what He gave them in Luke 11:1-4;  

'He said to them, “When you pray, say:

“‘Father, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come.

Give us each day our daily bread.

Forgive us our sins, for we also forgive everyone who sins against us.
And lead us not into temptation.’”

It was a start but a start is not an end point.  I wanted more of God.  I talked to my friends from the church, I prayed with other people and listened to how they spoke to God.  Then I eventually plucked up the courage to take the issue straight to the Lord Himself.  I just started talking to Him, telling Him about my issues and why I still felt I couldn't pray.  And it went on from there.  Three hours later I was still praying!  

There are still times when I feel separated from God and unable to pray but these moments are few nowadays and actually that is why our awesome God has surrounded us with a wonderful family in Christ so that we can have support from all sides.  

When I went away to UK to visit family for the summer I did wonder how I would be able to sustain my prayer life without the help from my Christian friends, but God knew that the timing of this trip was perfect.  It actually enabled me to solely rely on Him in all things.  To begin with I was so worried that I wouldn't be able to keep up the wonderful relationship that I had found myself in with the Father, with Jesus and with the Holy Spirit, that I started to pray almost constantly.  In my head, out loud.  I read the bible as often as I could and just continued my ongoing conversation with God for fear that I might not be able to start it again.  Then the fear subsided and I was left with the totally mind blowing realisation that God was with me in everything.  He literally was, by my side.  

It was at this point that He spoke to me about the issue I referred to at the beginning of this post.  He gave me another way, an alternative that I wouldn't have considered possible.  It may not work, because the forces of evil are strong, but of course, we all know who is stronger don't we?  So I will continue to pray about this and you can also all pray with me.


Dear Lord,

You are the creator of all things, seen and unseen.  You have dominion over all powers and principalities for you have overcome the world.  
Though I am not worthy you raised me up and did not let my enemies rejoice over me.  Oh Lord, my God, I cried out to you for help and you healed me, you brought my soul up from the pit and let me live.  
I thank and praise your Holy Name, that your power is made perfect in my weakness.  Thank you Father that though you have showed me great troubles and evils that you have returned and you have saved me.  Thank you for your promise that whenever we call upon the name of our Saviour, Lord Jesus Christ, we will be saved.  
Thank you Lord that you are here with me, that you are walking with me as I travel through the narrow gate, along the path of which only you know the way.  I pray that I will always be lead by you, that I will yield to the voice of the Holy Spirit and that I will always call upon your Name in times of trouble.

In Jesus' Name I pray,

Amen.